had to pick my son up from school today (my tummy hurts - which turned into hurling relatively fast). took his nap on the couch (they are so cute when they sleep…) and then his sister had a great idea: “How about you let me show him some stuff on my ipod and then he can do the same stuff on his ipod. It’s really funny and it will make him laugh - AND WE ALL KNOW THAT LAUGHTER IS...
Argument at the dinner table tonight: My son is planning on opening his own candy store when he’s old enough. He’s already got a name picked out, a concept for the whole venture, design of the store and possible cooperations with artists etc. Naturally, it is now time to start thinking about hiring some staff, after all it’s only about 9-10 years before he’ll open the...
Genius or insanity
My son has this habit of sensing when it’s his time to shine. He really is not the listening kind, but whenever his big sister gets in trouble he seizes the opportunity to be the “good kid”. Like this afternoon, when my daughter had this absolute shitfit, because I did not allow her to buy a big bag of Skittles, which she wanted to keep in her room. Not that I need to explain my...
The Most Tasteless Thing I’ve Ever Said
Coworker: “My friend died with a needle in his arm.”
Me: “Was he sewing?”
Son: Mom, what was your favourite website when you were little?
Me: When I was little we did not have a computer and there was no internet like now.
Son: You're kidding
Son: I didn't think you were that old, did you have any electronics?
Mom: We had a TV and a vhs video recorder
Son: I think I've heard of that, that's the thing with those thick dvds, right?
I survived baking with my kids. The secret to my success this year: bake a batch of cookies with one kids first while the other one gets to play Nintendo, then do the same with the other kid. Way less arguing, only had to make sure that each batch turned out the same amount of cookies, because otherwise “it’s not fair”! Nevertheless, I still stand by what I said in my blog...
Baking Christmas Cookies with the Kids
I don't know what the heck I was thinking. Last Saturday I told my kids I would start baking Christmas Cookies with them this weekend.
Me (Nov. 12): Wouldn't it be fun to start early this year and have yummy cookies to eat all the way up to Christmas? Let's bake next Saturday!
Me (Nov. 13): We should bake 4 different kinds, everyone gets to pick one recipe!
Me (Nov. 14): I guess we could start baking a few cookies next Saturday.
Me (Nov. 15): Don't you guys have stuff planned already next Saturday? Should we bake cookies the week after?
Me (Nov. 16): I don't think I will be able to bake cookies with you guys, my cold is just not getting better (cough, cough)
Me (Nov. 17): Unfortunately we will only be able to bake 2 different kinds of cookies. I looked at the ingredients and you are allergic to two of them.
Me (Nov. 18): How about a family movie marathon? We'll watch movies all weekend long! Yay!
Me (Nov. 19): What do you mean I promised? You know you should not use a word like that so carelessly!
End of story: of course I will bake some with them, but I'll insist on the least messy type...
Walking to school in the morning, it's snowing and eerie outside.
Son: Our Thompson language teacher Mrs. S. told us about the time she walked to school as a kid past a graveyard.
Son: She saw a glowing ball of light, it was green and yellow.
Me: What was it?
Son: A spirit of course!
Me: How do you know?
Son: That's how a spirit manifests itself.
Son: Sometimes people die so fast that they don't even know they're dead and that's when they show up as spirits.
Me: Makes sense.
Son: Basically, a spirit is someone with unfinished business.
Me: Is that what Mrs. S. says?
Son: No, that's from the movie "Caspar".
older guy: don’t you have a winter jacket? it’s snowing and pretty...
You are not making me
Son:”Just so we are absolutely clear on that - you are not making me put on my winter boots. Today I CHOOSE to put them on because that’s what I want. Out of my own free will. Don’t even say that I had to wear them anyway, because that does not matter. I WANT to wear them today. And just so you know, after school today I CHOOSE to put on my snow pants to play in the snow, because...
No mom, I don’t feel well enough to go to school today after throwing up. My stomach is only at about 47%.
40 - Day 2
Time flies. Heading towards 41 already. Still not feeling any different, just wondering if I am really a weirdo, like my husband says. I really could not care less about having a birthday, but since the whole family was on my case about this for weeks, I am trying to find the meaning in it. I will let you know when I find it. Day 2 of being 40 - move along, nothing to see here!
tumblrbot asked: ROBOTS OR DINOSAURS?
40 - Day 1
40 years old. Just like that. Oh the grand plans I had for today. Doing a little writing, reading magazines, talking for hours on the phone with the leftovers in Germany. I already felt it coming on last night, that little tickle in my throat. Crap. Not now! I have been sanitizing like crazy!!! Yup, there it is. My yearly cold. Now. WTF? Oh well, turns out I turned 40 anyway, and it was a day...
How many times can you say “like” in one sentence? My teenage daughter can say it 9 times: “OMG, like yesterday, I was like walking to the bus like this, and then like this thing hit me and I thought like it was like birdshit and then I like looked and I was like ‘never mind’, because it was like only a snowflake.”
What’s wrong with this picture: my kids are lounging on the living room couch watching “Geek Charming” on the 42” flatscreen while my husband and I are sharing the (way too small and uncomfortable) guest bed in the basement watching CSI:NY on the 21” TV, which has two huge purple spots on the screen because my son took a magnet to it. That damn bed in the basement...
Auer Life →
My new blog, about how the Bigfoot Headquarters in the basement were changed to an Interior Design Studio and why. You guessed it - first world problems…
My son thinks he’s psychic. This morning when we walked to school, he told me that during their last math lesson, the teacher asked what 12-6 is and he thought to himself: “That is soooo primary, but someone is going to say “5” for sure.” Sure enough, someone did say “5”. Proof number 1. Later that day his teacher said: “Statistically speaking,...
So I learned about all kinds of phobia(s) today… My daughter came home from school with a phobia ABC. Hundreds of phobias listed in alphabetical order, with some really weird stuff in it. After carefully scanning through the list I realized that only one really applies to me: Mageirocophobia, which is the fear of cooking. My husband did not take this seriously. Another kind of phobia kind...
Son: So I see mom bought a parenting magazine.
Husband: Sure, why not? We have kids.
Son: Well, it could not be for me and my sister, what else are you going to teach us?
Husband: What do you think it's for then?
Son: I saw that there is something in there about pregnancy and babies. Anything you want to tell me?